Tatas, tits, titties, boobies, jugs, melons, breasts – there are dozens of nicknames which describe one, well two universally loved body parts: Boobs.
Whether they are big, small, squishy, smooth, heavy, sexy, flat, hanging, natural, fake, saggy, huge, enhanced, perky, reduced, round, unique, soft, cute, squeezable, jiggly, wobbly, tender, massive, scarred, far apart, close together, all shades of skin colours, tiny, stretch marked, sensitive etc – everyone seems to be obsessed with them.
In the media, most boobs are still portrayed as being perky and big, but the reality of having big boobs is not always as great as it seems, therefore it is time to uncover big boobs stereotypes and talk about all the ups and downs of being a busty woman.
According to evolutionary psychology, men believe that women with larger hips and breasts (hourglass body shape) are more fertile than women with smaller breasts and hips and are therefore more qualified to carry out their offspring.
Breasts are basically bags of fat and were therefore in the past believed to be caloric reserves. Due to lack of food at that time, many people were starving and busty women seemed to have reliable access to food (because of their boobs being fat reserves) and guaranteed keepers of resources for their potential children.
Men also believe big breasts equal a high production of breastmilk, which in reality doesn’t depend on breast size at all.
While the psychology of big boobs gives us some interesting insights into the male brain, it doesn’t explain the oversexualisation and (wrongful) preconceived notions of females with big breasts.
Society feeds off stereotypes. Germans are engineers, Americans love fast food, Canadians are polite, British guys are gentlemen.
Women who are blessed/cursed with large breasts have to fight against stereotypes every single day.
According to popular clichés, women with big boobs are said to be easy, slutty, shallow, dumb. They have lower standards for who they have sex with than other women. Life is easier for busty women because anything they achieve seems to be due to their looks/boobs/having slept their way to the top, instead of skills, hard work, brains. Wearing anything revealing or posting revealing pictures online is an invitation for men to comment, grope and harass them and for women to gossip behind their backs – it’s a way of seeking approval and validation. Growing boobs at a young age means automatically being an adult and being ready for men making sexual advances towards you. A busty woman’s world revolves around deciding whether to show off or hide her boobs. Big boobed women use and manipulate men to get what they want. They constantly want to talk about their breasts, if they are real or not and how big they are.
Bigger breasted women are assumed to be more sexual than women with smaller breasts, because big boobs are associated with a high libido and increased sexual capacity. Busty girls seem to love showing off their boobs, which also supports the stereotype of them being more sexual.
However, having big breasts comes with daily struggles, like not being able to hide them, no matter what kind of clothes you wear, so most of the time busty girls aren’t even trying to show off their assets.
Getting dirty looks from men and women is part of a busty girl’s daily life, because we live in a society where women are expected to cover themselves up because certain body parts are deemed as sexually attractive and distracting to men. However, if we were all to run around without bras and t-shirts, showing our boobs every single day of our lives, men would get used to them and having big boobs, or boobs at all, would be no big deal anymore.
I have big breasts myself and I get judged every day. I get looked at and treated like I am of lesser intelligence because I developed big boobs as a teenager. Until people get to know me and realise that I’m smart and they regret having started a conversation with me, because all they wanted was to get in bed with me and my boobs and I am clearly not that kind of person.
Having big boobs is just one of many assets a busty girl has. We are like everyone else. We are gentle, loving, thoughtful, emotional. We talk too much, we talk too little. We are smart. We have kind eyes. Which you wouldn’t know, since you only ever look at our boobs, when you talk to us and not into our eyes.
We have big hearts, interesting personalities. Guess what – we have big boobs and brains.
I didn’t choose the big boob life; the big boob life chose me. Since I was a teenager, I’m known for my big boobs. Boys and men any age stare at me, make comments, try to talk to me. I got and still get a lot of unwanted attention.
And I agree, boobs are great. Big boobs are great, small boobs are great, all boobs are great. But the first and foremost reason why we have boobs, is to nourish and feed our children. Boobs aren’t just here to look and feel good. Boobs are normal parts of our bodies and if we choose to show them off, we shouldn’t get backlash for exposing them. We also shouldn’t be judged or being called prude because we are hiding our boobs. It doesn’t come as a huge surprise that teenage girls are so insecure about themselves if this is how they are treated by society, because they can’t do anything right when it comes to simple things like choosing which clothes to wear.
As a teenager with big boobs, I was very insecure. It seemed they just appeared overnight and I didn’t really know how to deal with them. For years I kept my bra size quiet, even from my closest friends and family (because I was never entirely sure which size I actually had and because I was so embarrassed by how big they were) and sometimes I still do, although I am not insecure about my boobs anymore and I wouldn’t want to change my body. But I want to change how having big boobs is perceived online and in real life. I want to be real, I want to show that it’s not all fun and games to have big boobs. I am here to show other girls and women with big boobs that they are not on their own.
Since I started talking about life with big boobs (#TITTYTALK) many people have reached out to me on Instagram. I have spoken to other busty women and to men who support the cause because their partners have big boobs too.
I have also received a lot of bad attention from males who think being open about my body gives them permission to send me unsolicited pictures of themselves. Which it doesn't. Which it NEVER does. I have been told that if I don't want to receive pictures like this, attention like this, I shouldn't upload pictures of myself and I shouldn't talk about big boobs.
Today’s society has become so consumed by sex, because we all know that’s what sells.But as soon as someone starts talking about what boobs are really for, men shy away and get grossed out. They like the fantasy and looks of big boobs but they don’t like the reality of stretch marks, of breast feeding, of back pain and they don’t know anything about it.
I recently got asked if my boobs are still growing and when I elaborated on the reasons why breasts change in size (pregnancy, periods, weight loss or gain and breast cancer), I was told that I had given the guy “too much information” that he didn’t want to know. I have also been asked many times why I am so obsessed with big boobs, when half of earth’s population is. Us women know ten times more about breasts than men do, so why wouldn’t we talk about them in the way they deserve to be talked about?
It’s time to wake up and serve some real #TITTYTALK – about stretch marks, back pain, boob sweat, bad posture, period and pregnancy boobs, insecurities, breast cancer awareness, bra fittings and everything else.
We are a whole community of big boobed women, fighting against the stigma that big boobs have to be perky and perfect, that big boobs are the best and most important things about us and that they define us.
They don’t define us. We are not just big boobs.
We are big hearts, big brains, big personalities.
And we are ready to talk about it all.